Recommend me some 2022 albums +1000th album halp

[rayword45]

Re: Meh, let's do it again, this time for a year

Day 1: We Are Pilots by Shiny Toy Guns (Album Choice: Korny)

Well... I'm like 2 or 3 weeks late but that's okay. I'm not gonna bother looking these guys up or writing an introduction or anything. Let me just crack open Spotify and get this over with. Tonight I'm too busy freaking out over tomorrow's Math and Latin finals so this review will not be wordy.

That first track wasn't so bad, I'm not a huge synthpop fan but hey, the alternating gender vocals were good and the song was catchy overall. But this second track, what the fuck? This bass is gross and so are the female rap vocals. I have no idea why, but this song reminds me of eating expired curry in a moist nightclub that smells like a mixture of BO and mescaline. Or maybe a Ke$ha concert. THIS was the lead single?! Why did I look that up I have to study for this math final (screw Latin).

These vocals are not to my taste. AGH DAMN THESE ADS I DON'T HAVE TIME. Tracks 3 to 5 all start out kinda spacey sounding, which definitely appeals to me, but they turn into clubby tracks within a few moments. You know, I didn't like the vocals on Le Disko, but I have to admit that they made the most sense for any song here. Overall, the female lead vocals make way more sense than the male lead vocals. I mean, we have these cold synths paired with a emo(tional) vocalist. It works about half the time (Rainy Monday, You Are The One). The rest of the time it's a really weird contrast. Shaken is a case where it works though, oh hell yes it works. The murky synths, chirping electronics, and pounding drums work PERFECTLY with the overemoting male vocals, and the female vocals in the middle are timed perfectly. Highlight track found. I'm just writing down everything that comes to mind. I'm not gonna check to see if these sentences are coherent or not. I hate Geometry, and I hate Latin. Thank god this is the last Latin test I'll ever take, and... Ah pre-calc. Damnit.

It's not very professional to go off on tangents, but screw you I'm doing this for fun. So yeah. This album. Okay I guess. I swear these will get better, but I have to study.

Best Track: Shaken
Rating: 6/10

[rayword45]

Re: Meh, let's do it again, this time for a year

Day 2: If You Wait by London Grammar (Album Choice: Trevor P)

One album down and a missed day already. Jesus Christ. Well hey, I promised it wouldn't be that formal. This time I'm actually gonna look up the album.

How's this for an introduction? London Grammar is a three-piece. They have a singer, percussionist/keyboardist and guitarist. Why do so many modern bands disrespect the bass? This album is about the singer's troubled teenage yearah fuck this let's just listen. Regular version no deluxe eff that.

So, to go off on a tangent, today I was panhandling with some other people and I learned Ray J makes babies cry. I didn't bother asking for his autograph because only an asshole would make babies cry deliberately.

But seriously, sing some 12-bar blues and nobody really cares, including babies. Sing I Hit It First in the presence of infants and they will cry.

Especially if the person singing is Ray J.

So according to my 20-second research the vocals got all the praise but after these first two tracks, I'm giving my praise to that liquid guitar tone. I have a headache so I'm paying literally zero attention to lyrics. How good can lyrics about teenage years be, "I fell in love, drank a lot, that loser broke my heart, drank in a less social context". The end. The vocals are pretty strong, I'll say that. Not really to my taste but I can see why they picked up praise. Since when does Spotify have consecutive ads? And since when does not reading books equate to becoming a creepy cat lady. It's not like those things are mutually exclusive. 5 tracks down, maybe I'll start paying more attention.

I didn't pay any more attention. I do notice that this album has too many piano ballads. And there doesn't seem to be much variety in the album outside of those ballads. Everything is pretty formulaic and samey. Fluid guitar lines, keyboard playing the bass parts or a trip hop drum beat, and those low, almost operatic vocals... I can see why this is tumblrcore (I'm just assuming it is based on the recommendation). When they change it up, it really doesn't make much of an impact, at all. Flickers adds in tribal drums and male backup vocals, and it still feels the same. And the album ends with another piano ballad. Wowee.

I guess I didn't pay enough attention to really write a review. But damnit I have a headache. This album didn't increase that headache nor soothe it. It was really samey. By default I'm giving it a middle of the road rating.

Best Track: I said I didn't pay any goddamn attention
Rating: 5/10

Now it's time for some headache curing food and some Boards of Canada and I'm gonna be HG HJHG HAAAALL right! Then the next album.

[rayword45]

Re: Meh, let's do it again, this time for a year

HEY IF YOU READ THIS AND YOU HAVEN'T RECOMMENDED ANY ALBUMS YET... FUCKING DO SO


Day 3: Programmable Love Songs Volume One by FlexE (Album Choice: korny)

3 albums, 2 requests from the same guy. Wow. Also 5 days and 2 already skipped. Wow.

Finals are over though. Hooray! Now I can catch up if I don't get lazy... I'll probably get lazy.

FlexE is a pseudonym for Benn Jordan, most commonly known as the Flashbulb. He makes IDM and Classical music, both genres I find to be rather pleasant yet rarely listen to. In terms of The Flashbulb, the only full album I've listened to is Kirlian Selections. Pleasant enough, not an amazing standout but it had some good tracks. Okay this intro is a waste of time.

This first track reminds me of Selected Ambient Works 85-92, same lo-fi chill sound. The second track has a bit more energy. I'm really not in the mood to focus. I must say that this sounds much older than 2004. What was the recording period of these songs? It sounds so incredibly retro a good chunk of the time.

Well, too tired to write much, but I like this album. The retro sound has grown on me, with the fast breaks, warm synths, and cheesy samples, and any time guitar is brought in it's fucking awesome. The chiptune tracks are good too. Not something I'll listen to daily, but not bad at all.

Okay I swear these reviews will get better over time. Still decompressing from finals and talking about course changes.

Best Track: Fashion Beagle
Rating: 7/10

[rayword45]

Re: Meh, let's do it again, this time for a year

Day 4: Whenever, If Ever by The World Is a Beautiful Place & I Am No Longer Afraid to Die

Dear anyone who has a band name that unnecessarily long,

FUCK YOU.

Okay let's get to listening. Today I will be reading The Maxx while listening, because I already watched the whole cartoon series and now I have to read to get the rest of the story. The review will hopefully be slightly more indepth this time since my attention span for reading is shorter than your appendage.

You know, fingers are pretty short.

Did I mention I'm biased against emo music? I try my best to avoid biases, but the concept of emo is one I can't seem to get behind. Everything I've heard that isn't moderholy shit this guys voice is almost IceJJFish bad. Bad, bad, bad. It actually sounds like he's using a double-track effect to make it WORSE, and singing out of key on purpose to make it WORSE. Is that an attempt to convey despair? I hope it's not, because it doesn't. It just sounds horrible. Anyways, what I was going to say is that everything I've heard in terms of emo has been a disappointment. Most modern emo stuff sucks, Sunny Day Real Estate was an exercise in monotony after that first track off of Seven, and Rites of Spring felt like a subpar Fugazi album.

The use of horns in Fightboat is cool but it leads up to nothing. Instrument wise this isn't so bad, but god, do all the tracks have this same drunken Rody Walker style of singing? It's more laughable than irritating, thus I can sit through it without ripping off my earbuds in anger like I do any time I hear Billy Corgan, but goddamn, I could take this a bit more seriously if the singer sobered up. God destroy these consecutive ads please. Let me get to sleep faster.

Any time there are group shouts, this album wins in my eyes. Any time we get into some quiet buildup, this album wins in my eyes. Any time the singer starts to strain, this album falters. The transition from You Will Never Go to Space to The Layers of Skin We Drag Around is fantastic in spite of inebriated vocals, and that diminuendo in Ultimate Steve is breathtaking. Then we get to drunken folk-rock man in Gig Life and it's all over, like crashing from coffee.

Onto the last two tracks now, and Low Light Assembly is actually really pretty, with the choral vocals and tremolo-laden guitar. Definitely a highlight, partially due to the fact that the vocals aren't hilarious. As a matter of fact, WHY DON'T THEY UTILIZE THESE OTHER VOCALISTS MORE?! They clearly don't suck, the lead singer clearly sucks. Use logic more, band. The bits of feedback toward the end are something I'm admittedly a sucker for, like a Kangaroo.

Getting Sodas is as post-rocky as the album gets, with the longer runtime of 7 minutes, blatant crescendo use and the only horns I've noticed outside of Fightboat. It's basically a 3 minute song which then goes into a 4 minute crescendo, which leads up to ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. It ends right when it should explode. Maybe I'm missing something, but goddamn that was disappointing.

Well, this album wasn't that bad. It was best when it was more post-rock than emo, and more listenable when it was instrumental. But not that bad. Perhaps my bias against emo is starting to go away... Perhaps.

But don't try to tell me that Sunny Day Real Estate is anything more than overhyped bullcorn.

Best Track: Low Light Assembly
Rating: 6/10 (Jesus my ratings are so middling it's pathetic)

[rayword45]

Re: Meh, let's do it again, this time for a year

Ever have one of those days that starts great, almost becomes fantastic but then takes a sharp nosedive and at the end, you just wanna say "fuck it" and wallow in self-pity?

Yep, today's that day.

So instead of using random.org like usual, I'm gonna cherry pick two albums today based on titles to hope that they'll improve my emotions because my usual dosage of Pink Moon, Tonight's The Night and Third/Sister Lovers is NOT providing me the usual catharsis I hope for.

Jesus I feel miserable.

Day 5: Fuck Your Emotional Bullshit by Snowing (Album Choice: ChikaraGuy)

Heh, yeah... Pink Moon really isn't working. So turns out this is an emo band... Is that a self-deprecating title then? And this is only an EP. Good, I'm not sure how much I can bear at a time.

So, compared to yesterd- I mean last album, this is much less post-rock in style, very garage band esque, with much more bearable vocals that are still idiosyncratic but don't seem to be deliberately offkey. "This is a song that will most likely bore you" yeah you're right about that.

For the most part, these guys are adequate at what they're doing, but I see nothing special about this. Another emo band. Also, it isn't cathartic at all. This doesn't make me feel better about the fact that High School sucks and now I know what I'm listening to when these reviews are over for the night.

Why is it that most emo is interchangeable? Apparently these guys are way better than every other emo band enough to become a /mu/ sensation but it sounds like every other emo band to me (Emo in terms of this style, it's not nearly as unbearable as the dumbass emo-screamo bands or the super sissy bands that the weird girls in your middle school class always wore shirts for).

Best Track: Not in the mood
Rating: 5/10

Day 6: Evisceration Plague by Cannibal Corpse (Album Choice: Sonicman68)

Let's go for the anger aspect instead.

Gotta be frank, the few songs I've heard from this band (mostly from Tomb of the Mutilated) I did not like, so I go into this cautiously. Unlike emo, I have no death metal bias, I loved what I heard of Decapitated and Death and enjoyed Amon Amarth but these guys seemed a bit... I dunno, sophomoric? Like Dethklok except these guys aren't cartoon characters. But we'll see how it goes.

So yeah, this is immediately different from the songs I've heard already from this band. The vocals are partially understandable, the riffs are more prominent, the drums have a bit more punch (but still play pretty much only blastbeats) and overall there seems to be a bit more energy.

And as different as it is, it still sounds pretty stupid. The more distinguishable riffs mean the guitar solos get to shine a little bit more, but the endlessly chugging riffs and endless blastbeats don't impress, and the post-surgery vocals get grating after a while. Hell, even the guitar solos are kinda boring. They're technically impressive, sure, but what good is a bunch of mindless sweeps if the main riff fails to captivate me?

A little tangent, but tell me, when you feel like you're being shit on for doing the right thing, what should you do? I see all these people smoking weed and having mindless sex, and I'm busy trying to do work to improve the school system as a damn kid, and I feel unsatisfied... Fuck my hormonal bullshit. But really, this is a pretty tough life at times. I have a really good job, try to be a good person, I've done some pretty big things, meeting with senators FFS, but I'm still unhappy. Jesus Christ I sound like a little bitch and I must stop. Save it for group. Boosh."

After listening, I decided to compare this album to death metal I like by listening to a song each from Death and Decapitated. I think the biggest difference between those two bands and this one is that those bands sound intelligent. This isn't so much "stupid" as it is "basic". The whole thing sounds like it's designed for mass appeal (or as much mass appeal as death metal can get), like if "bubblegum death metal" was a term this could very well be it. The differences between bands are so subtle yet so apparent to me. Maybe I'm just a pretentious prick.

Also, this album didn't provide any catharsis either... SHIT.

Best track: Nope, still not feeling it
Rating: 3.5/10

Yeah I think I'm just gonna watch some Venture Bros so I can feel the failure.

[Trogdor!!!!]

Re: Meh, let's do it again, this time for a year

Crane's Dreams - Kazakhstan
Dave Brubeck - Time Out
Oneohtrix Points Never - R Plus Seven
Avey Tare & Panda Bear - Spirit They've Gone Spirit They've Vanished
FreeTEMPO - The World Is Echoed
hana sumai - decayed ocean asylum
Blackmill - Miracle
Love Through Canniablism - Serial Experiments Tangela
Yuko Imada - Ome
aless - i'mmoble

Edit: Didn't notice you already added the stuff from choof's post. Just do that stuff instead. Or add these on. :^)

[3lijah]

Re: Meh, let's do it again, this time for a year

hmm. okay

The Royal Thousand-Glasscloud
Vulgar Display of Power-Pantera
Cannibal Corpse-Evisceration Plague(haha, you dont have to but go for it!)
The Joy of Motion-Animals as Leaders
Deftones-Around the Fur
Deftones-Deftones
Periphery-Periphery II:This Time Its Personal

[rayword45]

Re: Meh, let's do it again, this time for a year

Day 7: A Day At The Races by Queen (Album Choice: Remi C)

I laughed really hard when I got this choice. Thank you random.org

I'm also not depressed anymore, this'll be fun. I'm somewhat disappointed that this album doesn't contain any of the classics that I've heard. You know, Another One Bites The Dust, We Will Rock You, the forever classic Bohemian Rhapsody (that is pomp and bombast done right!). The closest thing to a song I think of as classic is Somebody To Love, but that was Jefferson Airplane. Anyways, let's see how I like this, I mean those songs were all pretty good, when it comes to stadium rock I'd much rather listen to Bohemian Rhapsody than some stupid Bon Jovi or REO Speedwagon bullcrap.

Those opening gongs are effing hilarious. And this first song totally rocks. Like, I would totally jump around like an idiot if I wasn't so lazy. This second song... I'm not convinced these guys are the best balladeers but hey, they are really good with harmonies. Not quite Brian Wilson level but they're pretty good. The song itself is kinda boring though. My wrists hurt. That is my excuse for getting more spare in my writing now.

This is not the Jefferson Airplane classic. It's not a bad song but I still prefer Grace Slick... No wait I hate Grace Slick. I prefer the rest of the Airplane. Or just Surrealistic Pillow since I've heard nothing else by the band.

I laughed a couple of times listening to this record. How much description do you need reviewing Queen? It's fucking Queen. Cheesy, bombastic, and arena-oriented rock. Those all sound like derogatory terms, and they may be, but who cares? Maybe this is a bit over-the-top but it still effing rocks.

Best Track: Tie Your Mother Down
Rating: 8/10

[rayword45]

Re: Meh, let's do it again, this time for a year

Day 8: God Bless Tiny Tim by Tiny Tim (Album Choice: Chris W)

I am tempted to just give this a 10/10 and call it a night. I'm not gonna write this as I listen. I'm gonna let it all sink into my head then write my thoughts out.

Transition here.

Well I said I'm not gonna write, but let me fix that. I'm not gonna write about the music itself. But the RYM page is fair game. It's very tempting to react to this music, not writing at all would be too damn hard. So... This RYM page. What the hell genre is standards? And Vaudeville? Is that a type of music? Shouldn't that be on RateMyTheater or something? One morning I shot an elephant in my panTHIS IS TOO HARD. The people on RYM seem to genuinely admire this man as a lost genius, not some obscure freak. I can't comment whether I agree or not because, you know, I'm not gonna comment... Shit. Everyone remembers that Spongebob episode right? Where there was a Tiny Tim song? Well, this album may or may not be totally loaded with songs like that! It's an album chockful of music!

Okay I must note one thing. The intro to The Other Side is SCARY AS HELL.

Back to not commenting!

Okay it's over. And... Wow. I don't know how to react to that. Is it novelty music? People are adamant on saying it's not but I'm not 100% sure. I mean, it seems like a lot of the time he was trying to entertain us. And it's described as vaudeville. As for the music, I can see why his voice would be grating but damnit I rarely care about voices. The arrangements were, for the most part, pretty good. You know I don't have much to say... Just, my mind is blown right now.

Screw you, I'm giving this a 10/10 just so you feel compelled to disagree with me.

Best Track: Strawberry Tea
Rating: You know, someone is bound to complain but screw you, 10 out of freaking 10. 10/10. 100 percent.

[rayword45]

Re: Meh, let's do it again, this time for a year

Day 9: Era Extrana by Neon Indian (Album Choice: David H)

Nope, not doing an indepth review today.

Three tracks in this is pretty good I guess. Electronic noise layered on top of jumpy synthlines with annoyingly effected dreamy vocals. These songs all sound the same. Yes, these songs are completely interchangeable. But the formula works. It's too subtle to ever get in your face and make a standout track, but thankfully too subtle to get grating for what is 45 minutes of the same shit over and over again.

Yeah this album just breezed by. And if this is chillwave, that's a cruddy genre name. This doesn't make me wanna chill this makes me wanna dance. I mean, 45 minutes of electronic repetitive noisy catchy music is supposed to relax me? Nope.

Standout Track: Are you joking?
Rating: 7/10

[rayword45]

Re: Meh, let's do it again, this time for a year

Day 10: Destroy Rock & Roll by Mylo (Album Choice: Casey D./csd)

I feel like almost everything I've listened to at this point is Electronic stuff. And here's more electronic stuff, this time from Scotland! ...Eh. I think I should pick out an album tomorrow, or two, based on how American they are.

Sunworshipper sounds like a collab with The Books. Or not really, it's just that one sample. As a matter of fact, there's no cello or guitar in this track. That was a horrible comparison. It's just a chillwave track with a sample in it. This isn't a chillwave album. This is just an exercise in electro house. 6 tracks in it's ultimately inoffensive stuff but the only track I can say I've truly liked is Sunworshipper. The rest have been pretty forgettable. Oh boy title track! I'm writing this with one hand! ...This is just disco music with sampled namedrops.

Yeah, again, a perfectly passable album. Nothing much to write about at all. I'm definitely cherry picking tomorrow's choice(s).

Best Track: Sunworshipper
Rating: 5/10

[rayword45]

Re: Meh, let's do it again, this time for a year

Day 11: The Wild, the Innocent & the E Street Shuffle by Bruce Springsteen (Album Choice: Gus V)

Well, I see not much that strikes me as Patriotic through this list. Springsteen is the closest to something "All-American" on that list.

I've never even listened to a single Springsteen song. Rolling Stone jerks off about him so much that I decided the smart thing to do would be stay the hell away. But now I'm listening, because it's the most American album on the spreadsheet. Let's do this, and see what I think of Rolling Stone after this.

...Okay, what the fuck is this? I expected something in the vein of Dylan-esque folk rock, not this funk-jazz mishmash. This sounds more like Phish than anything... Seriously, what?

After that baffling first track, he seems to be getting more into the Americana/folk rock sound I expected haha nope no he threw in accordions and more jazz horns. This album is overproduced to all hell. For an album that's supposed to be about working class America, lyrics about working class America should not be matched with lavish production with assloads of instruments and syrupy backup vocals. It's not particularly grating or anything, it just doesn't feel sincere. I will say that it does keep things eclectic. We have the jamrocky E Street Shuffle, funky Kitty's Back, exercise in country mediocrity Wild Billy's Circus Story, and the best track Incident on 57th Street which is basically a keyboard-driven ballad. And if any of these sound appealing to you, good news! They're all dragged out to about 5 million years! No seriously, there is no reason that the median track length here is 7 minutes. This very well could've been a more stripped down EP. Or short album. I mean, in the early 60s I'm pretty sure the average album was like 25 minutes. Nowadays the average album is around 70 minutes (with a usual 66 minutes of filler bullcrap). Doing the math, the average 1973 album should've been only been around 36 minutes, right? What's that you say? My math is bullshit? Well screw you! I'm right and you're wrong.

You know, I've been pretty hard on this album. And that's not fair, I have two admitted biases.

1. I expected greatness and was disappointed when I was not met with it, because... I dunno.
2. I don't like Rolling Stone and they wank over this guy every time there's a new album.

Ignoring that, this album is BOMBASTIC AS HELL. And unlike Queen it doesn't make me want to kick some ass with its pomp. It's not really a bad album, and I can see that Bruce is a pretty good songwriter... But yeah this is not my cup of cheese. People say his other works are different, maybe I'll check them out sometime in the next decade.

Best Track: Incident on 57th Street
Rating: 5/10

[rayword45]

Re: Meh, let's do it again, this time for a year

Day 11: Believe by Justin Bieber (Album Choice: Bernard L)

God... Damnit.

I didn't have to choose this, but I wanted a modern American icon. Or at least what was an American icon. And even though he's basically totally irrelevant now, he was inarguably THE biggest name in American music for a while. I was gonna listen to this sooner or later. I was praying this was a short album, 48 minutes? That's 47 minutes too long okay enough bitching let's do this.

Good: Based on this first track, this album doesn't feature his horribly grating prepubescent voice.
Bad: Based on this first track, this album features his (slightly less so) horribly grating pubescent voice.

But I'm one who believes vocals are the least important aspect of music. Like, maybe you can't sing, but it's okay if you are a fantastic lyricist, if you have some strong instrumental chops (Electric Ladyland is my all-time favorite album), or if you can make some great arrangements that match your idiosyncratic voice (What's up /mu/? I'm namedropping Neutral Milk Hotel here). Bieber can't do any of that.

Holy shit, Boyfriend is so creepy it hurts. Is this voice meant to be seductive? I can't really speak much for that aspect, but as a straight male, that horrendously ghostly beat with the near-whisper rapping is just... violating. I feel safer listening to Burzum than this crap. And track 3 is that annoying song that used to be played several hundred times every day. I'm not gonna write down the name. I will say, surprisingly, that Bieber is the less disgusting part of this song. Sure, the effects on the "lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-love me love me" part are hideous, but not nearly as hideous as Big Sean's ABSOLUTELY GARBAGE RAPPING and that obnoxious dubstep background.

You know, Catching Feelings isn't so horrible. I find Bieber's voice annoying as ever, the lyrics are more generic bullshit and the production is cheesy as hell, BUT I am a sucker for fingerpicked melodies. If this was actually solo acoustic, I might actually ENJOY it. I'm not ashamed of saying that.

Okay, maybe I'm a little ashamed.

Holy shit, that little feeling of "this is not horrible" went away pretty quickly. Take You was pretty bad, and with Right Here I'm starting to get a headache. Drake's voice comes in, and I actually begin to feel physically sick. This is powerful music for what is a bunch of electronic diarrhea and obnoxious singing. I'm forcing myself to not take breaks besides Spotify ads, but HOLY CRAP I cannot express this feeling. The 3 songs following that one little ray of fingerpicking light have gotten my eyes watering, my gag reflexes working, vomit creeping up my throat, leg muscles sore, temples throbbing, I WISH I WAS LYING. I WISH I WAS EVEN EXAGGERATING. BUT WOW THIS IS HORRENDOUS. Thankfully, the quiet part of Fall allows for a nice break, and Die In Your Arms doesn't have any adverse bodily effects.

I was safe for a good 2 tracks and 4 seconds. I enjoyed the first 4 seconds of Beauty And A Beat, not recognizing it. Then Nicki Minaj's larynx had to make a sound.

Actual quote of mine: "You know I thiuhhhh *short breathing*"

What I was trying to say is "You know, instrumentally this song isn't horrible" but Bieber's treated vocals make you want a really, REALLY hot shower. Nicki Minaj, on the other hand, makes you want a lobotomy.

One Love caused me to realize two things:

1. Drum machines, when used improperly, are the most heinous instrument ever (Yeah I know this was probably just a loop and not an actual oldschool drum machine but whatever)
2. Bieber actually isn't NEARLY as bad as the features on this album. He's still bad, mind you, but when he's not coupled with some obnoxiously untalented rapper, his voice grates on you a little bit less. And even less when it isn't disgustingly electronicified I don't care if that's not a word.

Now, last two tracks. Be Alright is a second fingerpicking song, and maybe it's the past 41 minutes just killing me, but I can't say I would ever enjoy this in any context, unlike Catching Feelings. It's considerably less overproduced than Catching Feelings, but thirty times more annoying. The final track is also the title track, and... You know what, I'm done describing these individual songs.

Well, let me be honest, Bieber is probably the least of the offenders here. All of his features suck worse than him and clearly have less talent than him. The producers here did a HORRIBLE job with disgustingly treated vocals, obnoxious electronic backgrounds and really nasty production overall. And seeing how he's credited with about 300 other writers for every song here, I'm going to put blame on them too. SOMEONE, GO MAKE THOSE WRITERS QUIT THEIR JOB. Lyrically, this album isn't a joke. The lyrics aren't "laughable", they're real tearjerkers. Tearjerkers because YOU WANT TO STICK A KNIFE UP YOUR TEMPORAL CORTEX JESUS CHRIST THOSE LYRICS ARE BAD.

See, with that Springsteen album, I was too mean in the review. Here, I wasn't too mean at all. I was too fucking nice. Sure, Bieber is the least evil here, but it's still an evil. A BIG EVIL. I would rather suffer from tinnitus for the rest of my life than listen to this album ever again. Take note. If I ever get detained for any crime, the people who are looking me up can read this and know how to torture me. Jesus Christ.

Gross. Sickening. Nauseating. Put any of those words after "The album Believe by Justin Bieber is" and you've got a correct sentence. I have never listened to an album so... Gross. I've listened to albums and songs about vomit, farts, date rape, pedophiles, white supremacy, BDSM, and many other questionable subjects. And surprisingly some of those WEREN'T Frank Zappa songs. Despite all that, I have NEVER felt physically ill from listening to an album. Skillet may have given me a bad headache but never have I felt physically ill from listening to an album. I wasn't able to eat yogurt while listening to this album, and I gagged while brushing my teeth. THIS. IS. BAD. STUFF.

Best Track: FAR AND AWAY, Catching Feelings
Rating: 0.5/10

[WSCB]

Re: Meh, let's do it again, this time for a year

Here are a few favorites of mine (excluding a couple of albums that were already listed (Untrue / Pale Blue Dot / Kirlian Selections / Kezia)).

ASC - Time Heals All
Autechre - Tri Repetae
Calibre - Even If...
Eric Whitacre - The Complete A Cappella Works, 1991-2001
The Flashbulb - These Open Fields
Godspeed You! Black Emperor - F#A# (infinity)
M83 - Dead Cities, Red Seas & Lost Ghosts
Nujabes - Metaphorical Music
Seba - Return To Forever
Submotion Orchestra - Finest Hour

EDIT: You can put [Cern - Terminus] in place of anything you don't want to risk listening to / has been listed already. haha

[rayword45]

Re: Meh, let's do it again, this time for a year

Day 13: Kind Of Blue by Miles Davis (Album Choice: Phillip S)

Meh... I'm pretty neutral to Jazz as a whole. I almost never go out of my way to listen to it, but it's pleasant enough when it comes up. It seems most people either hate Jazz or adore it, but I honestly couldn't care less for the most part. I do like some jazz-influenced rock and electronic music, if that counts. Okay time to listen.

For the record, I've realized at this point that giving an introduction to the artist is usually entirely pointless. If you want info look it up yourself jackass.

But I will go against what I said in that I must point out that this was ranked number 12 on Rolling Stone's list of the 500 greatest albums of all time. That does two things. I now put this on a pedestal because 12 is pretty damn high. But I also kind of ignore that pedestal, because that list sucks. Sgt Pepper's over Pet Sounds is unforgiveable, and they said Pink Moon and Third/Sister Lovers were the WORST albums by their respective artists. That's just some horrendously wrong opinions right there.

Uh... This is problematic. I have no idea how to criticize jazz music. With rock music, it's super easy. The vocals suck, the guitar sounds like boiled ass, the bass drum sounds like a ham being slapped with a baseball mitt, the production is horrendous, the lyrics were written by Stephanie Meyer, et cetera. What am I supposed to criticize? This first song, and I assume the rest of the album, is based on none of that. It's piano chords, a bunch of ride cymbal taps, an upright bass and horns improvising.

Daaaaaaamn, that ride cymbal is impressive! ...Yeah I'm really, really lost here. This track is just about to end. And I have no idea what I'm supposed to say. The horns sounded pleasant. The bass was pleasant. Everything here is pleasant. And yup this second song is more of the same.

Blue in Green reminds me of A Charlie Brown Christmas. I have absolutely nothing useful to say, so take that useless quip as my criticism. Don't like it? I really don't care.

Well, now that the album is over, I'm at a loss for words. That's not a good thing. It's not a bad thing, either, mind you. I just don't know how to review jazz. That was... nice, I guess. Good improv, which is to be expected with all the big names on this album. It's perfect easy listening music, for a late dinner, or for homework, or for drinking copius amounts of expensive alcohol. It didn't personally stick out to me, but I can't say I'm a huge jazz fan or naysayer. I'm not disappointed at all.

Best Track: uhhhhhhh
Rating: 7/10 (oh crap I'm gonna get shot)