Respect

[Andrew Mitchell]

Re: Respect

alot of ffr comments commended as being strongly vaginal which bothers some men

[LoveHurts67]

Re: Respect

OP sounds just like me, except that I only treat women with respect unless they deserve it, same thing with men, I treat both genders equally (cept the love and secks part lmao). And if they don't deserve it but I still treat them with respect, that just means I want her to ride mah horsey.

[Nyokou]

Re: Respect

I like being disrespectful to pretty much everyone I don't know/don't care about. Hell if I care. Life isn't all rainbows and pixie dust, if people act like assholes or bitches (such as me) then let 'em do it. Who cares? No one is forcing you to talk to those people. Just stay away and it'll be okay.

[Rubin0]

Re: Respect

lol @ Nyokou

[TC_Halogen]

Re: Respect

I'd really like to know what's so hard about being a "nice guy" or about being overall respectful to women here. I mean:

I treat woman with respect, go out of my way to make them feel happy

lol

seriously?

I mean, yeah, I know their are guys out their, that are douchey that only care about that ass or what the **** ever. And to me that is vile. I am not into porn. I am not into smacking that hoe or some other stupid guy stereotypical ****. I treat woman with respect, go out of my way to make them feel happy, just like I do for anyone else.

And I see absolutely nothing wrong with that - going out of your way to give someone that you care about (or are attempting to care about) at least shows that you have a heart. It also shows that you want respect given back to you. There's a difference between wanting respect given to you, and getting stepped on by someone though; if there's no boundaries set, you're going to end up treating someone too nice and you'll never get anything in return.

Sometimes, i don;t even have to know you, I'll still go out on a limb. It really pisses me off when I hear girls make fun of guys, or quote 'they have standards'. I'm sorry. Did I ask to look like this? Noooo. Are you really so shallow as to only care what I look like instead of liking me for my personality? Yeah I thought so. You are a hypocrite.

Now hold on a minute. If you're all about respect, why are you getting entirely upset at the fact that a woman is demeaning you or chastising you just because they don't fit to what your "ideal" woman is? There's nothing stopping you from having set standards in what you see in a girl. In fact, you responding the way you did shows that you want someone who looks at you for who you are, and while it may not seem like it, that too is a standard.

If you don't care for females who look at you for your looks because they want someone who is physically attractive, then don't adhere to these standards that you so adamantly disagree about. Calling them a hypocrite for viewing things differently than you makes you look that much more like a jerk - it shows that you don't care for what their reasons are for why they are that way...

You say you hate when guys do that to you, but you'll sit there and do it to the rest of us, well deserving guys. I'm tired of people having their pick of guys, choosing the dumb douchebags after douchebags, and then complaining, to me nonetheless of how they want a nice guy in their life and oh how can they ever find one. **** you.

...and again, it goes back to who you have chosen, which is entirely your choice. If you're being open about who you're with, telling them (or showing them) that you want to be with they for who they are, and they don't care for showing you the same "respect", then leave them.

If you cant open your eyes then you dont deserve happiness. I can honestly say I would give anyone a chance. I would willingly date anyone, get to know them and judge from there. Things change in a relationship. I know there are always friends, but sometimes the rules of the game change while being romantic. But ****, everyone always think they know everything.

How is that fair? You do realize that some people (both male and female) have certain things they refuse to change because of something that may have happened to them in the past (or because of an insecurity)? If they feel that they can't connect with certain men on a personal level, why should they be deemed to live in anguish and sadness for the rest of their lives? It may not entirely be their fault that they act a specific way, and telling them to deal with it is entirely unfair. Being that you understand enough to say that you would give anyone a chance, you should also be aware of that fact that giving someone a chance may involve a mindset change from yourself, otherwise you'll never connect with your significant other on a personal level.

There's no reason for anyone to tell you how to do anything, regardless of how confident or sure this person may sound. Go with how you feel.

[Reincarnate]

Re: Respect

imo this is a typical case of nice-guy-syndrome

There's nothing wrong with treating people well. But stuff like "Sometimes, I don't even have to know you, I'll still go out on a limb" speaks volumes. If you're willing to constantly go out on a limb for people you don't really know (who may, in fact, not really deserve such good graces), it implies that you're fairly insecure and need the validation of others to fulfill self-worth.

How is that, in any way, attractive? A truly assertive man should not be conflated with the sort of sycophantic, spineless "nice guy" who is essentially a doormat that is respected by no one. People don't love a doormat -- they use it and walk on it. You clearly lack confidence, which is a massive signaling device. Think of it like advertisement. If you don't even value your own underlying assets, how are you going to expect anyone else to?

"If you cant open your eyes then you dont deserve happiness" only solidifies the point. You're really saying "you don't deserve to be happy because I am unhappy that you won't overlook my flaws," which is fairly selfish. It shows that you're really only thinking about yourself and don't really care about others. This sort of attitude leaks through and people can sense it from a mile away.

Being unattractive is one thing, but having a bitter, self-entitled attitude will turn almost any girl off. Plenty of unattractive dudes have successful relationships with smart, pretty girls all the time.

False respect is hardly respect at all. It sounds like you're not being too respectful, yourself.

[Artic_counter]

Re: Respect

Now hold on a minute. If you're all about respect, why are you getting entirely upset at the fact that a woman is demeaning you or chastising you just because they don't fit to what your "ideal" woman is? There's nothing stopping you from having set standards in what you see in a girl. In fact, you responding the way you did shows that you want someone who looks at you for who you are, and while it may not seem like it, that too is a standard.

Well, it's true that this is also a standard but not every one of them are "right" and pissing on a person's face for having ****ty opinions is, for as long as I'm concerned, alright. It should even be encouraged to criticize the standards and opinions of another person.

Nether less, I stopped giving a damn a long time ago about that subject when I realized that dating someone isn't the ultimate goal in life and that it won't necessarily bring you happiness. I'm just looking for a good time with the people a interact with and if I don't have one, than that's just too bad. Life shouldn't be taken too seriously in my opinion.

Edit : And also, what reincarnate said.

[[email protected]]

Re: Respect

Instance 2. Girls and their standards. Now this is slightly more vague and slightly more personal, but I'm sick and tired of all your stupid standards. I mean, yeah, I know their are guys out their, that are douchey that only care about that ass or what the **** ever. And to me that is vile. I am not into porn. I am not into smacking that hoe or some other stupid guy stereotypical ****. I treat woman with respect, go out of my way to make them feel happy, just like I do for anyone else. Sometimes, i don;t even have to know you, I'll still go out on a limb. It really pisses me off when I hear girls make fun of guys, or quote 'they have standards'. I'm sorry. Did I ask to look like this? Noooo. Are you really so shallow as to only care what I look like instead of liking me for my personality? Yeah I thought so. You are a hypocrite. You say you hate when guys do that to you, but you'll sit there and do it to the rest of us, well deserving guys. I'm tired of people having their pick of guys, choosing the dumb douchebags after douchebags, and then complaining, to me nonetheless of how they want a nice guy in their life and oh how can they ever find one. **** you. If you cant open your eyes then you dont deserve happiness. I can honestly say I would give anyone a chance. I would willingly date anyone, get to know them and judge from there. Things change in a relationship. I know there are always friends, but sometimes the rules of the game change while being romantic. But ****, everyone always think they know everything.

This^ its almost like you read my mind

[psychoangel691]

Re: Respect

I think it's kinda funny that women are being pointed out as being shallow and only dating the "hot" guys. There are more women out there that will date an unattractive guy then there are guys that will date an unattractive girl. There's tons more pressure put on women to look good and most guys feel like they need to impress their friends and wont go near a girl that's say a bit overweight.

Anyways, typically you'll find more shallowness in girls not women. Girls don't know what the hell they want till they hit at least past 21 typically. Granted this isn't always the case but majority of the time dating is more of a sport than anything before that age.

Also people need to realize it's not life or death to have a relationship. The more you search for it the less likely it is to come. People need to just chill out and live life and when the time is right it will happen. You don't need to date a whole bunch of people in your lifetime. Hell I wish I hadn't been in as many relationships as I had been because the heartache of it sucks.

Now it seems your problem is hey I'm the nice guy but these girls wont date me because of how I look. Did you ever think that maybe because you're so nice to them they feel really comfortable with you and end up just wanting to stay friends to not complicate things? I ended up dating a best friend at one point and I remember when he asked me out I was like I don't want this to end up ruining our friendship so idk but I took the chance anyway. We ended up ending it and he and I would still hangout here and there but then he just stopped talking to me all together which really upset me because he was a great friend to me. Sometimes we don't want to risk something we have that's great. So don't say that it's because the girl is being shallow because that may not actually be the case.

Anyways, on respect I respect everyone until I am disrespected. I'm also the type that will bend over backwards and be there for people but treat me wrong and I will turn into a bitch I won't deny that. But I also don't feel I deserve to be disrespected and will stand up for myself if I feel the need.

[MrGiggles]

Re: Respect

And to me that is vile. I am not into porn. I am not into smacking that hoe or some other stupid guy stereotypical ****.

hahahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHA this is awesome

I dont respect people who dont respect me.
Plain and simple.
Why should I respect those who look down on me and condescend me other than the god I dont believe in and karma?

wait why are you all so ****ing pessimistic

I like being disrespectful to pretty much everyone I don't know/don't care about. Hell if I care. Life isn't all rainbows and pixie dust, if people act like assholes or bitches (such as me) then let 'em do it. Who cares? No one is forcing you to talk to those people. Just stay away and it'll be okay.

oh god i can't read this thread anymore i cant breath

[fido123]

Re: Respect

I understand where the OP is coming from, and agree with him taking into consideration he's posting while fairly upset. I consider myself a nice guy by doing things I consider common courtesies such as holding the door open, saying please/thank you, talking to people in a friendly tone, and letting people in while driving, just stuff like that. The majority of people all around me are like that and it drives me nuts personally.

EDIT: Lol at not looking at porn. By nature's rules we should be having sex often as soon as we start getting sexually interested. Porn is how we deal with it.

[aperson]

Re: Respect

If someone disrespects you it's their problem not yours. Sounds like you make it your own problem MetalAtlas, maybe bc you are too much of a 'nice guy.'

[aperson]

Re: Respect

Better question here is how many people respect themselves?

[TheSaxRunner05]

Re: Respect

Honestly I felt the same way (as the OP) when I was in high school. I got over it, and found a girl who was just as boring as I was.

[TheSaxRunner05]

Re: Respect

Our society is far to focused on attractiveness.