The problem kid is back!!

[Bahamut-X]

Re: The problem kid is back!!

Why do you keep complaining that she can't keep a calm argument when you're the one getting out of hand and nagging her like crazy? I found her comments extremely calm. You, on the other hand, seem to get extremely deffensive/nagy. Her argument was reasonable too. She doesn't see things the way you do. It's different. End the relationship. I can see why she wouldn't want a relationship with you.

[masterhickle]

Re: The problem kid is back!!

Attack the idea, not the person.

Anyway....

To those of you saying I have a problem...I don't deny that I do, nor will I ever, unless by some stretch I realize that I've made right what is wrong with me.

Point #1 down.

How is my argument considered to be stalking? I can't get a straight answer as to why she says she still wants this relationship, and she wants to be able to hold a conversation, but she wants me to start it, and has openly admitted that she, most times, has nothing to say? That was a contradiction on her part.

Conversation is key in ANY relationship...I'll stick by that statement unless someone can provide me with a more logical reason that conversation ISN't key than why I say conversation IS key.

Point #2 down.

I can accept a failed relationship....I HAVE accepted the fact that this relationship has more than likely failed. But who was the one that came back when I sent the message that I wanted this relationship over? I believed what she said about how she thinks we have a chance, so I just tossed aside what I said

Point #3 down.

Lastly....to a more recent post...
I have considered that she may be bored with the relationship....I have considered that she may be a type of girl who wants to be with someone "just to be with them, so as not to feel lonely." (I think that was said in a reply to one of my other posts)

Point #4 down.

Anyway...
I need to see how things go, if I get any kind of positive response whenever she starts talking to me again. If I don't get anything positive.....well, I'll decide whenever that time comes, if it does.

Just for all you out there saying I need help or whatever other garbage: I know I need to do some thinking about my life, what I want to do, how I go about fixing whatever is wrong with me.

Thanks for attacking me through posts.

To any of you who thought (hoped) that your posts would hurt me in some way, or expected me to hurt myself because of a post attacking me: YOU FLIPPING LOSE. I've already thought about most of what I've been hearing, just in much different ways.

[slickskater29]

Re: The problem kid is back!!

Heres what i think you should do...dont hate me...I'm not recomending you do it...

Ask her why she loves you...if you get one of those responses that are like...uhm...well...i dunno, then id consider ending the relationship

oh and Jello...nice flame ****tard, im glad ur sig accuratly describes urself, except for kicking my ass at any game

[FishFishRevolution]

Re: The problem kid is back!!

Ey wut up, I remember this chick. Okay so here's what you need to do.

Sit back and realize there are about 10 million better chicks at your fingertips that you can have 100X better time with if you just DUMP THIS BITCH LIKE THE HO SHE IS. Seriously, you ARE being clingy if you're still with her. You need to get out and get out fast. If you had left when I told you to last time you'd probably be with some other awesome chick and would be posting topics like "whoa guys thanks for the help, my life is great now 8)"

So do it. TONIGHT.

[NaOTa4231]

Re: The problem kid is back!!

1. Just wondering, the time in between the last thread you made until now, were things changing for the better or were you still trying to get her to talk to you?

2. Is this the first relationship you've had? It kind of sounds like it, because you continue to "go out with her" even though the one thing you want out of the relationship(conversation) is not up to par with you.

* I really hope you haven't been parading her with IM's telling her she needs to talk more since your last thread.

Have you ever stopped to think that perhaps she isnt the one with the problem? Perhaps it's you. Maybe she is the kind of person who builds conversations off of what others say, and maybe you just dont spark that interest in her.

I was thinking that too. Have you tried changing the way you start a conversation? Have you tried joking more? Try doing things she wants to do.

[Spazzbite]

Re: The problem kid is back!!

Ask her why she loves you...if you get one of those responses that are like...uhm...well...i dunno, then id consider ending the relationship

This is actually a very good thing to ask, since it's basically impossible to dodge and retain a good reaction. Though, from what it sounds like, she's trying to avoid talking about any problem that might be in the relationship, which is a problem within itself. I recommend saving time and breaking up, because from the sounds of it, only more problems can come from this.

[Thassodar]

Re: The problem kid is back!!

Actually this is VERY similar to the problem I'm having with my own girlfriend, but I never posted it on the forums to get alot of peoples opinions. This is SO similar, in fact, that I've said a few of the same lines that HE said. I don't consider myself to be clingy, nor is it my first relationship, BUT I really don't want to lose this girl. Love sucks. I will suggest to the original poster of this topic to PM me if he wants more details on the issues I've been having with my girl because I refuse to be trashed by 12+ people for CARING.

I've gotten advice from many people irl, and they think I should dump my girl as well, but after 1 and a half years of being together thats kinda hard...

[masterhickle]

Re: The problem kid is back!!

Finally...a few posts I don't have to argue with

NaOTa:
For a short time, things were changing for the better; everything in the relationship was starting to look up. Then things went into a slow decline, and eventually ended up back where they were originally.

And this is indeed my first relationship, but I can't say I've felt this strongly for anyone else. I want this one to go on, but if we can't even tell each other anything, I don't see the point.

I've also tried to do things she wants to do. Everytime we go out: What do you want to do? Where would you like to go to eat? What movie would you like to see? Is tonight good for you to do something, or would you rather wait for another night? Most of the time....I dunno, your decision. The one thing she takes most of the say in is what movie we see.


Thass:
I agree with you completely. I don't consider myself clingy....I don't want to lose this girl....it's hard for me to even consider ending this after about a year of being with her.




If this is even possible.....maybe my problem is I care too much.

[stretchypanda]

Re: The problem kid is back!!

You asked for advice. You didn't ask people to baby you and tell you everything is going to be all right.

[Thassodar]

Re: The problem kid is back!!

He wasn't asking to be babied, he was trying to get a little help or some ADVICE on what he should do. Seriously. The advice given wasn't really given in a friendly manner either.

Nobody wants to be told "everything is going to be alright" because it gets you nowhere, but additionally nobody wants to be bashed for trying to get some help.

I wouldn't go out of my way to defend this guy if I didn't see his side.

[lord_carbo]

Re: The problem kid is back!!

Dump her

I agree.

Oh, don't ask for advice if you aren't going to consider using it, especially when the same advice comes from a whole bunch of different trustworthy people who are older than you.

[dontcareaboutmyid]

Re: The problem kid is back!!

We all said dump her in the last thread he made. He didn't take the advice. I said if he posted up another problem with the same girl, he was going to get **** about it.

We're just fulfilling our promise.

[masterhickle]

Re: The problem kid is back!!

Thass, again, thank you.

I was never asking to be babied....I was asking for advice....advice given in a non-childish/non-bashing manner. I thought that became obvious within my first few posts.

And as for "don't ask for advice if you aren't going to consider using it;" I consider using all advice given to me....some pieces of advice it takes me less time to decide if I'll use it, some pieces of advice more time. As for most of the advice given in these FFR posts, because of the bashing I've received, I always come in here with the attitude of "I'm not likely gonna accept any advice they give me."

Congratulations on screwing yourselves into the ground....it apparently takes most of you a lot of effort to not bash others.

[Varia]

Re: The problem kid is back!!

J Von Schwartz: do you even want this relationship? I mean seriously...with the kind of IMs I've been getting from you

Answer lies within this line.

[masterhickle]

Re: The problem kid is back!!

Say what?

Im kinda drifting away from this topic as Im finally getting FFXI reinstalled after many tries....bleh