Tales From Work

[Charu]

Heya folks, Charu the Squawky Snivy (also known as major fuck ass extraordinaire) is here today to bring you a fantastic thread... possibly!

Majority of us on FFR have grown up with the site and majority of us have jobs that have to deal with people. Be it may as little as two a day, or to hundreds per hour, I think sharing our highs and lows in the work place could be something that I think a lot of us would love to see.

May or may not have gotten the idea in my head after lurking tales from retail on good ol' reddit for a year or two.

Alright, I'll share one with y'all. It's one of my favorites to tell.

---

Now as everyone knows, or well, the vast majority of you know, I work in a library. A school library in that it doubles as both an academic and public library. Because of my location, being so near Detroit and the neighborhoods that are infamous for their brutality and unique demographic, I'm prone to these bizarre situations that happen from time to time.

The one I'm about to share happened 6 months ago, give or take.

A middle-aged man walks in on a Saturday wearing your typical every day clothes with some papers in his hands. I'm stationed up on the circulation desk (think receptionist) and he asks me.

"Pardon, but do you know where I can upload a resume to a job I want?"

"Certainly, go through the glass doors on your right and head down to our computer lab. If you need help with the actual upload, ask the person at the periodical desk!"

"Thank you."

A'ite, no problem, just a normal Saturday and I go back to browsing random websites and being bored as there is no books to sort through at the moment and I'm essentially a one man army in the front.

Suddenly, a scream of rage after, err... lets say 15 minutes. I get up and ignore protocol to stay on desk because... well, when you hear someone raging, that ain't good.

Turns out the middle aged old man was fighting (verbally mind you) with the librarian on desk, as well with the periodical person. Periodical guy says that he called the campus police because the yelling guy looked like he was gonna go from being verbal to physical real fast.

I notice that one of the computers had pieces of plastic scattered around it. Turns out the guy ripped a CD Tray out.

So security comes, takes him away while they say he damaged property and their going to bill him, and I'm just left there speechless.

So... why did the CD Tray get ripped out?

...

The guy was wanting to upload a resume. However, he did not heed my advice. Instead of asking for help, he sits at a computer with the paper in his hand. Folds it up, and then sticks it in the CD Tray. Getting angry, he demands then to have some assistance from the librarian. Librarian tells the guy that the method he's using isn't the correct way so attempts to get the paper out of the tray.

Surprise, the tray is stuck.

Furious, the person takes his car keys and forcefully rips the tray out to get his folded papers.

Cue what just happened.

Just. Library. Things.

---

...Any who, that's one story. I got others. If any of you got some things to share, I think it make a good read. Don't be shy!

[Arntonach]

Re: Tales From Work

Working as a casino security guard offered me some odd tales for sure, cause what happens in Vegas is supposed to stay here.

There was one guy that passed out at a slot machine and needed 5 smelling salts to wake up. Me and my partner had to drag him to his room and physically make sure he was in bed.

Another time at one of the restaurants someone slammed a pressurized door closed so hard, it broke off it's hinges. The sound was so loud that we got calls that a bomb went off. Strangely, no one working at the restaurant saw anything. They heard the door break, but never saw anyone go in or out. This is also when we found out that the staff at that restaurant never report anything in fear of losing their job, because the person in charge sleeps with the food and beverage manager.

There was also one time when I had to deliver nyquil to the casino owner's ex wife at 11PM, well after she has gone to bed since she goes to bed early when she's sick. You see, while the owner and her divorced just fine without incident, the co-owner (who actually gets shit done) loathes her and has us do this on days she's sick. We have to do this, mind you, because the last person to refuse got fired on the spot.

Finally, there was one time we got a call to a fire, outside by the north parking lot. Turns out some rubber insulation was set on fire, so that was pleasant to take out (I mostly freaked out sadly). While we thought it was due to some faulty equipment for a bit, someone who saw what happened told us that someone was smoking on their room's balcony and was putting the ashes out over the edge. Rather than contemplate how much cigarette ash is needed to set fire to rubber insulation, we try to find the room. Sure enough, not only was the room on a floor of "No Smoking" rooms but no one was there (lights and TV were on though). The next day, I found out that security caught them when they went to check out.

So those are just a few from working at a Casino.

[Dynam0]

Re: Tales From Work

Lmao amazing^^

I handle insurance claims over the phone so typically I'm just ripping people off and an asshole in general. There are some sweeties out there though that understand and are genuinely thankful so you take the good and ignore the bad...

Mostly just do car accidents/thefts/fires etc. but I'm starting to get into property/commercial which is a lot more interesting. (Auto is brutal ugh)

[inDheart]

Re: Tales From Work

jussayin: as you write up your stories, remember to clean them of identifying information! as much as we might like to laugh at ridiculous people, it's not great if this is the way a story gets back to them.

now a story from me:

i've mentioned in the college thread that i work as a TA during the school year. part of my responsibility is leading a discussion/work section, which instructors typically use to give smaller, more focused programming assignments. this past spring i worked for an instructor who did exactly that. grading was pretty much a spot check - when they finish, they'd have to flag me down and show me that their program worked as intended, and i'd also do a quick look at their code just to be sure there wasn't any ~magical print statement wizardry~ going on (happens more often than you'd think). the system worked well: it meant i never had to take code over email, and score bookkeeping pretty much all happened during class time. i would always keep two copies of marks, one paper, one electronic.

during the last week of classes, i invited any student from the whole class to come to me and finalize their last grades. this session would be the hard assignment deadline. since there were obviously students i didn't recognize, each time someone gave me something to score, i asked their name to be absolutely sure i recorded it for the right person. it went fairly well even for being the last-minute deadline. pretty much everyone that came in was able to sit, work, and show me something working by the end, and i had all their names down etc.

enter the grade grubber.

someone not from my section emailed the instructor and claimed to be missing roughly half the grades for these little weekly assignments, and they mentioned going to my session to show me the last two. this was actually a student we'd been worried about for some time and couldn't manage to get in touch with. the TA for their section couldn't even remember who they were, it had been so long since they'd made an appearance in class; the only thing we were really sure of was that they were still on the roster, so they hadn't dropped.

two instant problems with the student's story from my end:
- the first of those two grades wouldn't change anyway, because it was past due by then. the instructor announced the policy rather well, so they would have had to disregard almost every channel of communication to miss it.
- i have no record of this student even coming to me. like, zero recorded attempts. having talked to everyone in the room (it's not like it was a huge rush), i seriously doubt i missed them.

that other TA checked, and the story couldn't possibly match the attendance record either. (they were challenging their attendance grade too, of all things.)

now, it's not up to me to decide what's a legitimate excuse to make up an assignment, but having been brought into the discussion because of my involvement, i didn't see even an attempt at one. long-time educators like to joke about how many grandparents start dying as the term ends, but this wasn't that - this was a challenge leveled directly at our record keeping. i was astounded by the weakness of reasoning. i can't tell whether they put more effort into the assignments or the lies. like, even a conciliatory "sorry, i dropped my computer in an aquarium and had to ship it away for repairs and then i couldn't change my account password so it expired and i couldn't use any other computer and i'm also allergic to pixels they give me an eye rash" would be more reasonable. i don't write this to mean "lie better" though; just if you're going to put in effort, distribute it through the semester onto the things that actually matter.

they probably still passed, but with only the distinction of being the subject of the story i will tell in the first staff meeting this year.

i also have a good amount of stories from other jobs, definitely not all venting like this one, but i have to sanitize them a little more closely

[KrazyKitsune]

Re: Tales From Work

#justlibrarythings

[Kawaii025]

Re: Tales From Work

This just happened today.

Part of my work attire is a shirt with the company's name & logo on it.

So a customer asks me, "Do you work at (competitor)?" I look at him confuzzled before he asks me the same question again. I slowly shake my head. And he asks me the same question a 3rd time.

I say "What can I help you find here at (company I work for)?"

He tells me what he's looking for and I send him on his way. He never acknowledged or recognized that he kept saying the name of a competitor.

[Izzy]

Re: Tales From Work

Shit. Nothing interesting like this would happen at my work because we don't directly interact with customers. It's just a bunch of nerdy guys working on software in an office.

[thesunfan]

Re: Tales From Work

I cannot begin to tell you how many calls I got at Domino's asking if we have Stuffed Crust pizza

[XelNya]

Re: Tales From Work

TWG players may or may not recall this story as I remember making a post directly after this happened.

Also need to denote that I am an average (maybe short) white male, skinny ass arms, and a beer gut despite lack of beer drinking being frequent. I weigh like 175.

I am known at work for being both the guy who cares the least about literally everything, and brags that he doesn't try at all, and guy who has helped get two managers transferred out of the store (story for another post.)

Also fuck you guys this is funny format.

> Be me.
> Be 23.
> Work at walmart, fucking truck unloader.
> Under-staffed, and call outs on top of the under-staffing, we have like, 7 people to do like a 12 person job level dumb.
> One of the call outs is our direct supervisor. Ass hole. Is still my boss to this day.
> Me and coworker Tyler are in charge due to orders of manager over us. Any problems, we tell her and she deals with it.
> Knew truck was 3,400 pieces in one truck (standard is around 1,500 to 2,100, short hand is, it's the size of two.)
> Fight fastest truck thrower with argument that he throws too fast for small group of people, and I had laid claim the day before. TRUCK WAS MINE.
> Unloading large truck.
> Truck is well stacked (especially compared to the norm.)
> I get into the zone, have two headphones in, fucks are not given about anything else. It is me versus a line full of 4 people and some ass hole sorting shit because DC is too lazy to fix their machine.
> Everyone is busting ass. I'm able to both unload the truck, and keep the line of freight pushed out by myself, and the line is consistently full, I at times unload the freight onto the line whilst sitting down level full.
> Make throne of freight at times, and laugh at line workers who come in to see if line needs to be pushed out. It's already done. By me.
> 4 hours into truck.
> Need to note that at 5 hours of being on the clock with no meal break, we get a verbal warning / written up for meel break violation.
> time is now 8:05 pm or so.
> We clocked in at 4:00 pm.
> I am on the back wall of freight.
> I think it's about 8:30, because I was not smart, and did not check ipod for time. I usually pace myself by listening to certain albums and I know how long they are.
> Line has been moving at a slower pace for about an hour.
> I tired them out I thought.
> All of a sudden, hear call for frozen truck.
> Ignore it because it's 8:30.
> Fastest truck thrower comes into truck to the back where I am at.
> Tells me that half of our understaffed line had to go do ignored frozen truck.
> Two people on the line when it's 8:30 and I am on the back wall is pretty much us not finishing before we violate.
> There are other associates, Dairy and Produce, who could have easily handled the job.
> Lose my shit.
> Start yelling really mad.
> "Management is a bunch of fucking retards" yelled as loudly as possible.
> Yelling many bad things about management, above comment the most noteworthy.
> I am yelling loudly enough that you can hear me halfway across the store, and on the other side of it if you're currently unloading said frozen truck. (Told to me later.)
> Anyone who came into the truck to calm me down got told to fuck off.
> Pretty sure I called them useless cunts as well.
> Loud angry rant about how much management is fucking up.
> Management is currently in the backroom, in the aisle where the back-stock of shampoo aisle stuff is.
> Old boss is standing next to them.
> Management "Ok, we know he gets mad sometimes, but is he usually like that?"
> Old Boss "No, if he's that angry, you guys messed up."
> Manager comes and yells at me in the truck to go to lunch due to being pissed off as fuck.
> Tell him to fuck off and go to lunch.
> Coworkers finish the truck by themselves.
> Other manager asks if I am ok on the way out, tell her I don't wanna blow up on her because she's one of the managers I actually like.
> Walk out to sales floor.
> Check phone.
> 8:05 PM.
> FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK.
> Walk across parking lot.
> Eat Panda Express.
> It was good. They had a hilarious mishap with the receipt. Lady who worked there eating on lunch had to come help. Ended up having lunch with her. Nice lady.
> Stillpissedoff.jpg
> Come back from lunch.
> Pull whole set of freight in 20 minutes because still angry.
> End up stopping pulling due to fatigue and that expensive items we got in that day, need to be checked off, so I do that.
> No one on crew when they come back talks to me save for Tyler. He explains everything. I'm still angry though.
> On sales floor now checking off PDQ's.
> Customer walks up to me, visibly annoyed.
> I still look pissed off as hell. I'm still angry. Regardless of what time it was, the choice was fucking dumb in the scheme of things, the conclusion I had come to.
> "Hey, you look more friendly than-"
> Laugh hysterically. Fucking lost it.
> Direct him where to go. Tell him about why I was laughing on the way. He laughs to.
> Later on that day, get customers who are trying to fit a toilet seat on a bucket.
> End of day comes.
> Not everything is done, but most of it is, which is surprising considering.
> Go home.
> Don't sleep that night, worried I am getting fired the next day for calling managers retards and cunts.
> Come in the next day.
> Ass hole boss is there.
> Tells me he knows of what I did yesterday, and laughs about it.
> Ask him if he knows if I am getting written up. He'd tell me these things if he knew, so I asked.
> "Nope."

> mfw I got away with it
> mfw other managers knew about this story
> mfw this is a story we tell the new guys
> To this day, still no formal write ups, or verbal discussions. One customer complaint ever. Was laughed at by management though. Pretty much never happened.

Things on this might be slightly inaccurate as I'm trying to remember a good amount of time back, and my memory is an example of being shitty.

I have a few more stupid stories but that one is probably my 3rd highest achievement.

[Dinglesberry]

Re: Tales From Work

jesus that font is the most irritating thing ever, pls my eyes ;_; Need to highlight post to read it

you should exclusively use it..

[XelNya]

Re: Tales From Work

jesus that font is the most irritating thing ever, pls my eyes ;_; Need to highlight post to read it

you should exclusively use it..

... I should have used green and not lime lol

[TheThong]

Re: Tales From Work

So, I work as an emergency nurse and this patient came into fast track (your cuts, bruises etc). His story was, 'put a bottle of spirits in the rectum to get more intoxicated, and the bottle is stuck '.

The doctor who came to see him manually pulled the bottle out, and when it came out, guess what - the lid wasn't even off.

[Dinglesberry]

Re: Tales From Work

So, I work as an emergency nurse and this patient came into fast track (your cuts, bruises etc). His story was, 'put a bottle of spirits in the rectum to get more intoxicated, and the bottle is stuck '.

The doctor who came to see him manually pulled the bottle out, and when it came out, guess what - the lid wasn't even off.

Crikey mate o_O

[TheThong]

Re: Tales From Work

Crikey mate o_O

We've had much worse haha

[_Zenith_]

Re: Tales From Work

... I should have used green and not lime lol

I used to work there, a truck unloader and stocking after trucks were unloaded

It is 100% warranted anger

Working back there is #1 bullshit lmao

Good story, good read though