What should I do?

[Spenner]

Re: What should I do?

So my main question is: Assuming proper diagnosis and therapy, is medication truly worth it in my situation?

As it currently stands, my main personal suspicion regarding dopamine-releasing agents revolves around the possibility that it could potentially leave me feeling satisfied with something less than what would define the integrity of my ideal self (basically what I had outlined in red at the start). Though obviously, I could probably be wrong. Then again, when taking into consideration the endeavors that I have undertaken (aside from their trivial nature since they're related to playing games after all), it is apparent to me that most of my ability is derived from my constant dissatisfaction with it thus resulting in a constant need to improve upon it.

So to put it simply, my goal is not to achieve serenity by naturally lowering my expectations and fully taking solace in things for what they currently are. My goal is to grant myself the mental ability to persevere and get things done without being forever plagued by painfully-quick discouragement and a constant looming feeling of complete inadequacy.

Any input would be greatly appreciated, I would very much like to clear any and all doubts of mine on this matter in the event that I truly am just a few steps short of an effective path to recovery.

I'm not an expert on this subject, even though I'd prefer to be-- I'm practically in your shoes circumstantially and ideologically. But you should take great care in figuring out what path to take medically. I don't mean medicinally, but the full spectra of your medical outlook, not just the pills you're prescribed. It's very important to take into account all of the peripheral things that are causing a lack of energy or arousal, be it an environment which is discouraging or if it really is just a cognitive architecture you have which disregards the need for a full blown reward response.

Psychiatrists can only give you an opinion of what you have observed going on in your head, unless they are extremely rigorous (or you exhibit very specific symptoms which reveal a root cause of something). I've been to a few myself and honestly, because I myself didn't fully understand what the finest, most fundamental problem was, I wasn't pursuing the right treatment, and I wasn't asking the right questions. It's worth your time and energy to learn how your brain is actually functioning, or underfunctioning, if there is a lack of activity going on.

Basically, map out on your own time, the aspects of your ill natured symptoms, and try to think and reduce reasons for that, and try to step away and look at the problem abstractly. Figuring out how you're disconnected from having a functioning reward response is a key part in knowing the right questions to ask a doctor that's studied the specifics.

I'm not saying to go out and get a degree in neuroscience, but I'm recommending you watch some lectures on human behavioural biology and learn to unravel this mystery partially on your own. It is valuable understanding, being able to see order in the chaos in the case of what goes on in our brains. Getting past a chapter like this should have nothing to do with having to lower your expectations of things, but it may very well have a lot to do with acceptance of things. Don't leave the question open, really do some research on it.

[Spenner]

Re: What should I do?

Also Arch, while that is a very detailed portrait, I must ask the question of whether or not your excitation DOES exist but just in the wrong areas. Having stimulants in your system is going to help your neural networks start working together, having the energy to actually interact, instead of buzzing vigorously in their own circles, still with dopamine, but not in all the right areas.

When you take a dopamine releasing agent, the hierarchy to which places receive it is something I'm not familiar with. But I'd imagine it's different from person to person, and that we cannot simply generalize this one scenario and recommend it to everyone. Neuroscience is endlessly interesting because of our individual differences @_@

[Arch0wl]

Re: What should I do?

sure, but pharma-dose amphetamine isn't harmful. it'll either be a night-and-day difference for you (which it was for me) or it'll barely do anything.

from my experience with dosages, it's a good benchmark to tell if someone has ADHD or not. I am currently about 200lb, and 10-15mg of amphetamine is more than sufficient. meanwhile, very non-ADHD sorority girls I knew in college would take 30 or even 60mg of Adderall to get whatever effects they wanted from it.

I gave some to one of my best friends and the only thing that happened to him is that he was slightly more awake. he's the opposite of me in this respect -- wakes up smiling like he just got his dick sucked by the sun and is ready to make pancakes or whatever, and can easily stay focused on an activity if he needs to.

[Spenner]

Re: What should I do?

It's only harmful in a scenario when it's influencing a neural network which is fundamentally benign to work more efficiently, I mean you wouldn't give it to someone with a serious anxiety bound schizophrenia. At regular dosages it really is a remarkably and minimal drug.

I mean look at it



It's pretty sleek.

They really should have testing to see how people respond to things that increase levels of dopamine, i.e. observe if someone is becoming reliant on the drug itself or if they are beginning to have adaptive behavioural changes and whatnot that are good. If I was given a trial of it for say, 5 doses, and was monitored and scanned and honest about what was going on in my head, it'd be a way clearer way to tell if such a drug is something that would work for me. There's way too much guessing and too much assumption with psychiatric diagnosis.

[Arch0wl]

Re: What should I do?

If I was given a trial of it for say, 5 doses, and was monitored and scanned and honest about what was going on in my head, it'd be a way clearer way to tell if such a drug is something that would work for me. There's way too much guessing and too much assumption with psychiatric diagnosis.

PREACH