Intellect...

[Z3ratul]

Specifically, the role it plays in a relationship. My current situation is an odd one... right now I think getting some insight and wise words might be the help I need. With that, I ask you this question:

In a relationship, would you prefer your 'significant other' to be:

A) Smarter than you.
B) Equally intelligent to you.
C) Not as smart as you.

And of course, why?

Thanks guys.

[JLoAct]

Re: Intellect...

Well, in general, it all just depends on your personality and your intelligence, but i prefer girls that have the same intellect or maybe a little less, but be more organized than me, so she would help me.

[scorpio1690]

Re: Intellect...

In a relationship I would like the girl to be at least as smart as me. This way you could hold an intelligent conversation with her. Not necessarily smart in the same fields as you though, so you can really learn about other things. I find with a person that I see as less intelligent than me I tend to say things that end up belittling them and that wouldn't work out too well.

It really comes down to just plain common sense sometimes. I know people that are geniuses when it comes to math, but are dumber than a sack of bricks when their skills are applied to common sense. It seems intelligence levels are only really measured in a highschool or college where you're compared, with your spouse, on a scale with all the other people. Yet once out of that comparison as long as you can hold a conversation and have things you both relate to, intelligence doesn't really come in play necessarily.

This is all speaking on the terms of common sense, the "standards" of the people, or at least the standards I hold. All in all I wouldn't want someone less intelligent than me. I absolutely detest having to "dumb down" things I say just so others can understand it, it's a nuisance and one of my pet peeves. It goes to basic instinct in some instances as well. Breath taking girl/guy, but is stupider than a rock. That really shows if you're shallow and superficial or not. I've been faced with that one alot, and I generally like girls smarter or equal to me because I can learn things and also teach things that are brand new to them.

[talisman]

Re: Intellect...

A or B, really. No one wants their partner to be someone they can't hold a conversation with.

[Shopowner200]

Re: Intellect...

I agree with talisman. If you can't talk about anything because she isn't smart enough to carry intelligent conversation, that is not a great boat to be in.

[Tasselfoot]

Re: Intellect...

well... I've dated a girl who scored under a 600 on the SATs (combined, old SATs). Needless to say, I was not going out with her for her wit. I had to explain just about every intelligent thing I said to her. Although I enjoyed being so superior to her... an ever-present ego boost. In the end, it grew tiresome.

and now with Whorli, it is like others have said... we're of comparable intelligence (I'm probably a bit smarter... ), but in fairly different fields, so we can each laugh at each other's lack of knowledge of certain subjects. Like she knows anatomy, bio, and english... I know psychics and math. Neither of us know history. And it is nice, because while we may not understand the exact natures of each others expertises, we are able to hold conversations on anything.

From that ego standpoint, I probably wouldn't want to have a significant other who is smarter than me. Would likely make me feel dumb too often, which is a hard thing to do. But, someone has to be the dumb one in every relationship.

[TheRapingDragon]

Re: Intellect...

I'm along the same standing as Tasselfoot. I have a girlfriend who I would say is of equal intellect with myself, but in different fields. She is knowledgeable in languages, memory, science etc. I'm more knowledgeable in stuff like psychology, literature, business and computing, but it means that we can talk about anything.

Personally if she was stupid compared to me I'd get bored of having to explain subtle humour, sarcasm, all that stuff that I do all the time to people. I wouldn't want her to be smarter than me because I would probably end up feeling belittled or just not good enough.

[Reach]

Re: Intellect...

I think it really depends. I mean, I wouldn't want to date a moron, but you wouldn't necessarily have to be highly intelligent.

If I had my choice though, for some odd reason I think I would choose A. There's something sexy about it. XD

[Z3ratul]

Re: Intellect...

Currently, my situation is C. I'm on the intelligent side of the spectrum, and I'd call her 'average'.

I find with a person that I see as less intelligent than me I tend to say things that end up belittling them and that wouldn't work out too well.

It really comes down to just plain common sense somtimes.

Precisely what I'm trying to avoid. It just seems that she never really grasps my thought process, no matter how hard I try to explain it... which in turn gets me frustrated. Particularly when she claims to understand, but I KNOW she doesn't. Not that I'm an aggressive person... on the contrary- I'm pretty nonchalant... but I do have my buttons (when somebody tells me what I think or how I feel... damn that pisses me off). Whenever we talk, it's never really us discussing thing... it always feels more like I'm preaching.

And on the common sense matter, that reminds me of my sister. Academic wise, she's horrible. But her and I get along incredibly well together, and we understand eachother's humor and sarcasm.

psychics

Did you mean physics? Or actually psychics? Regardless, you pretty much nailed what I'd like in a relationship with what you and Whorli (pronounced hore-ly or or-ly?) have.

I think it really depends. I mean, I wouldn't want to date a moron, but you wouldn't necessarily have to be highly intelligent.

If I had my choice though, for some odd reason I think I would choose A. There's something sexy about it. XD

Exactly. And I'm wondering if that intelligence gap is just too large for me to stand. She's a cool girl, but it just annoys the hell out of me.

And as for the last statement... XD

[ckj846]

Re: Intellect...

If the person is less intelligent then you, I would probably suspect that the two of you are going out just because of looks and probably sex. I believe this isn't the basis for a strong relationship. I would prefer that "significant someone" to be equally as smart as me in different areas, just like Tass and Whorli.
O_o