Turns out profile.php includes a file X, then it includes a file that includes a file that includes X again. This makes php throw a fatal error and die since it tries to register the same function names twice. Fixing it now / when I wake up tomorrow.
Since the include is non-essential in profile.php I've went ahead and commented it out before I go to sleep. Profiles will be statically visible. The only thing I've found so far that works is that you can delete comments.
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