2017 July/August Set 2 (Complete)

[DossarLX ODI]

The following files can be played in Genre 6 (Classical) of the public engine.

A new Torch, a new Legacy
Flying Moon Creature
Solar Overdrive
Stay Alive with Style!

[DossarLX ODI]

Re: July/August 2017 Set 2

James May finished the primary judge task for July/August 2017 Set 2. The notes can be seen below; this thread is being moved over to Completed Sets.

The passed file review can be seen here.


[5.5/10] A new Torch, a new Legacy {Dan Johansen} (M0nkeyz)
Song Choice: Nothing too special with the song, feels a bit bland honestly.
Sync: Offset should be right but the notes are late by a 192nd, might have to do with DDReam not liking positive offsets since the slight deviation starts at around 6.303 (with the current offset of 0.081 you have in place)

~Technical review~
08.389 - Should be a 14 jump, given there's a larger prominence in the sound on the 4 that's accompanying the arpeggio on 1.
09.081 - Same, but instead of it being a 14, make this a 13.
10.235 to 11.158 - Make this a 12421 stream; PR
12.312 - Should be a 34 jump.
14.389 and 14.620 - Should be a 23 jump on those two spots.
16.466 and 16.581 - remove those two notes, the sound is faint and barely audible on 1.0 and I couldn't even hear this when I played the file on 1.7
20.851 - Place this on 4 to signify transition to a new set of ascension
22.928 - Remove it. If the layering is following the arpeggio, then this note should not be present as this note is following the organ. Also, you didn't layer that sound on 25.697, further adding the need to remove it for consistency in layering.
37.005 - Where is this jump going to?
38.620 - Jump shouldn't be here, you didn't layer the other 8ths that had a jump layered in.
39.774 - remove jump
****the entire section, starting from 33.312 to 55.466 - There is a serious inconsistency in the usage of jumps here. The best I can say is that you should remove all of the jumps. Leave the hand on 33.312, make the jump on 55.466 a hand as well. Make the sounds that are going to the cymbals into jumps because as of right now, the jumps feels awkward and out of place in this section and this is the definite killer of the file. I implore you to redo this section in regards to the jumps, please.****
**55.928 to 1:05.389 - Since this is practically copy-pasted, the sound is descending. Should start it on the 4 column and have the jumps be either a [14] or a [24]. The only time that it should be varied up is when it ascends (with the case on 1:01.466, which even then, it should be 1324[13]; and on 1:02.851, it should be 2314[12])
1:05.389 - Remove note pl0x
1:16.697 to 1:17.620 - there's the issue of PR once again. From 1:16.697, the order should be actually mirrored, with the note on 1:17.620 being a 34 jump.

While having a slight fun factor of playing the file on rates, and this having an opportunity of being a good introduction file to streams and progression, it has the downside of having numerous errors in terms of jump placements and in PR. I do advise to restructure on the section from 55.928 to 1:05.389 as that section just felt like it was tossed into a blender and have no consistency in it. Should fix on the section that has a **** and ** on it first.


[6/10] Flying Moon Creature {Dan Johansen} (M0nkeyz)
Song Choice: Same as the prior file.
Sync: Sync is on point.

~Technical Review~
1.223 - Ghost Note
**0.080 to 6.937 - Why is the PR mirrored? Especially on the two notes in 6.509 & 6.651 which sticks out like a sore thumb?
**9.223 to 9.794 - should be all on 1. Why is there notes missing on 9.509 & 9.651?
10.937 - Missing note
**12.651 to 13.223 - Should all be on 2, why is there more missing notes here??? Should have notes on 12.937 & 13.080
31.937 - Ghost Note
43.509 & 43.651 - these two should be on 2.
1:01.509 - Should be on 1
1:13.794 - Should be a jump
1:28.080 - Missing a note here, place it on 4
**1:29.794 to 1:30.366 - Should be placed on 1. Also, missing notes on 1:30.080 & 1:30.223
1:31.509 - Missing note, should be on 3
**1:33.223 to 1:33.794 - Should be on 2, missing notes on 1:33.509 & 1:33.651
**1:36.651 to 1:37.223 - Should be placed on 1. Also, missing notes on 1:36.937 & 1:37.080
1:37.794 to 1:38.080 - Jacks should be on 1
**1:40.080 to 1:40.651 - Should be on 2, missing notes on 1:40.366 & 1:40.509
1:43.366 - Ghost Note
1:54.937 to end - The two bursts are missing a 32nd after the jumps at the start of each burst transition, making them each a [12]31234[23], but the way it is positioned makes it feel awkward to play to be honest. And it feels sudden that you include the 32nds here when there has been other sounds that had the 32nds as well. Either remove the 32nds (since the 32nds are following both the piano roll and thed rum roll funny enough) or adjust the 32nds so that it doesn't feel awkward to hit.

Slightly better than the first file in the batch, but has glaring errors that should have been easily spotted. This would have been an excellent beginner jack file though.


[Pass/10] Solar Overdrive {Dan Johansen} (M0nkeyz)
This file is the bane of my existence. Either my finger dependency is bad on this file or there is some really weird transitions going on in this file. Need a second set of eyes to see if its not me.


[8/10] Stay Alive with Style! {Dan Johansen} (M0nkeyz)
I was expecting Bee Gees samples from the song title alone >:C

-Nothing too erroneous surprisingly, just gonna be a bit rough on rates lmao.
-Although I did notice a missing 24th burst (1:13.367 to 1:13.581 & 1:14.652 to 1:14.867).

Easily your best file in the batch, just give the file a final comb, brush up the ending a bit. I do want to suggest though to actually cut a bit of the outro because it does drag on a bit. But other than that, Good job on the file.

[DossarLX ODI]

Re: 2017 July/August Set 2 (Complete)

DarkZtar resolved the passed file in this set.

[2/10] Solar Overdrive {Dan Johansen} (M0nkeyz)
changed offset to -0.059
-0.059 why is this a quad. This should be a jump at most.
-2.241 if anything you could put a quad here to the crash if you reaaaaallly wanted a quad somewhere in the file, but this should also probably a hand at most.
Right off the bat, the layering in this is an absolute mess. You've got jumps to the guitar melody that kind of come and go randomly, with percussion layering to fill in the drops in the guitar layering?
-5.059 there's a missing 16th/12th in here to the guitar. Has a weird rhythm so you might have to do some janky stuff to make it work.
-5.377 putting ALL of the layering inconsistencies aside (cause honestly I'm confused to the point where I'll just say redo all of your layering), the guitar rhythm here does not snap to 16ths. It's offset by like a 32nd.
-5.650 also the guitar rhythm doesn¡¯t have a gap here
-6.604 alright im convinced you¡¯re focusing on percussion layering, so just redo this section with percussion layering in mind and take out all the jumps to just the guitar melody.
-8.104 guitar rhythm doesn¡¯t snap to 8ths here.
-9.332 alright straight 16th¡¯s is not even close to what the guitar is playing here
-9.741 the jumps here almost sound like they should be on the 16ths before them. (the last jump can stay since there¡¯s a crash there)
-10.968 I¡¯ve never really like usage of jumps to highlight pitch peaks outside of really dense sections with a lot of stuff going on, and this scheme makes even less sense when you¡¯re already focusing on percussion in the first place.
-18.877 another place where the guitar rhythm is generalized to 16ths and it¡¯s completely wrong.
-27.332 same thing with the guitar rhythm being super off
-29.514 missing jump
-30.604 missing jump
-30.741 missing jump
-31.695 missing jump
-32.241 missing jump
-32.377 missing jump
-32.650 missing jump
-32.786 missing jump (could also put a hand to crashes like this throughout the file)
-33.877 same concept of missing jumps to the guitar throughout this repeating section
-40.014 should be a single
-41.104 should be a jump
-42.195 background guitar runs straight 8ths, no reason to have any gaps in the 8ths here.
-43.423 guitar rhythm runs through to the next 4th
-45.059 should really step the pitch bends in the guitar here
-47.854 guitar rhythm here isn't the same as 43.423. In general you might have to dicksync a lot of the guitar riffs since this sounds like a live guitar recorded over a bg track which means a lot of the rhythms are not going to be precise.
-59.968 ^ basically what is happening through this entire section. The guitar is playing inconsistent rhythms here and you've attempted to generalize it to either 8ths or 16ths.
Playing through the rest of the file gives me the impression that a lot of the errors mentioned already repeat or show up in some other shape or form. Ending the review here since I think you've got a good basis for reworking the file.