I'm usually not that guy

[customstuff]

Re: I'm usually not that guy

I hope you can find a way to get rid of him Sorry to hear that dude...

[flipsta_lombax]

Re: I'm usually not that guy

My mom and I were talking about the same subject around Christmas Eve. She told me when I was only 6, my dad was with another person while we were back in the country. From the time she found out until now, my dad never apologized about it and thought it wasn't a big deal.

My mom cries every time she brings this subject, especially since I am the only person she can really talk to about it (our relatives are distant from us, literally and expressively.) She asked me how I would see her if she divorced dad, met another man and got engaged with him.

I basically told her that even though you're still my mom, I'm going to look at your differently and things will never ever be the same. I'd be more indifferent with you and 'your husband' and that he can never replace dad even if he tried. I'd end up the not speaking to them..

Before this becomes even more tl;dr, let them change the whole picture and see if the new perspective makes a better one. If they fail to see the bad side of their choice, they will suffer the consequences, but we can't do anything about it.

[All_That_Chaz]

Re: I'm usually not that guy

Wow, thanks for all the support guys. I really wasn't expecting this. =')

Yea, I don't live with them so that means I don't have to deal with it up close. It makes it easier to ignore them entirely. Also, since I'm 23 my relationship with my parents doesn't have much authority involved anymore. However, I love my mother very much and she's not an idiot and doesn't like it when I don't talk to her. It's just that I don't have much choice in the matter. Be civil to him or she's done with me. It's just that she knows I can't even look this prick in the eyes. It was different with my dad. He kept his relationships secret. My mother is forcing the issue with me. She feels it's my business to accept this guy.

Jurs got me thinking. Maybe I just can't deal with the fact that I don't have any control here. Living on my own has made a big difference in my life, and even when I was living with my parents, I more or less did what I wanted (was a good kid, built up trust, exploited it, was the better-behaved of two siblings, etc.).

Anyway thanks again everybody and happy holidays.

[blindreper1179]

Re: I'm usually not that guy

as long as when your going to see your mom you miss/love her more than you hate him, just take a backseat on it.

[Nyokou]

Re: I'm usually not that guy

Good luck, Chaz. I think you mentioned this "kind of" before to me.

Really sucks, but you will pull through.

[Relambrien]

Re: I'm usually not that guy

ITT: A rare moment of compassion from several FFR posters

Seriously though, good luck with it Chaz. There's some excellent advice here; just try to keep in touch with your mom while avoiding the guy, more or less.

[joe579003]

Re: I'm usually not that guy

who cares just put on a fake smile at the wedding and leave. You're in college, you don't have to live with them. You sound like you need some absinth or something, just chill amigo.