Fortune cookies are hitting a new low.

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  • Boochypa
    FFR Player
    • Nov 2003
    • 83
    #1

    Fortune cookies are hitting a new low.

    The three that my parents and I got today said:

    "You look pretty."

    "You will receive some good news in the mail."

    "A carrot a day may keep cancer away."
    Tags: None
    • Omeganitros
      auauauau
      • Jun 2003
      • 8897
      #2
      Wow, that is lame.

        Comment

        • MalReynolds
          CHOCK FULL O' NUTRIENTS
          • Sep 2003
          • 6571
          #3
          My fortune cookie said something good will happen to me on Thursday. My girlfriend broke up with me, my mom lost her job, but I did find a quarter.

          Those damn fuckers are infallible.

          Mal
          "A new take on the epic fantasy genre... Darkly comic, relatable characters... twisted storyline."

          "Readers who prefer tension and romance, Maledictions: The Offering, delivers... As serious YA fiction, I’ll give it five stars out of five. As a novel? Four and a half." - Liz Ellor


          My new novel:

          Maledictions: The Offering.

          Now in Paperback!

            Comment

            • Anticrombie0909
              FFR Player
              • Jul 2003
              • 4683
              #4
              I found the best fortune cookie ever:

              "Don't kid yourself. The people at the video store know exactly what you're renting."

              I laughed.

                Comment

                • fusi0n
                  FFR Player
                  • Nov 2003
                  • 2158
                  #5
                  Jack Handey quotes should be printed on fortune cookies.

                  Confucious < Jack Handey.

                    Comment

                    • GuidoHunter
                      is against custom titles
                      • Oct 2003
                      • 7371
                      #6
                      The day I lost my virginity I got a fortune cookie that read "Something good will happen to you today" or something along those lines. That's the only time I've seen a good fortune out of a cookie.

                      --Guido

                      http://andy.mikee385.com

                      Originally posted by Grandiagod
                      Originally posted by Grandiagod
                      She has an asshole, in other pics you can see a diaper taped to her dead twin's back.
                      Sentences I thought I never would have to type.

                        Comment

                        • QreepyBORIS
                          FFR Player
                          • Feb 2003
                          • 7454
                          #7
                          I got one that said: "You like Chinese Food."

                          Something else, eh?

                          Signature subject to change.

                          THE ZERRRRRG.

                            Comment

                            • fusi0n
                              FFR Player
                              • Nov 2003
                              • 2158
                              #8
                              Originally posted by QreepyBORIS
                              I got one that said: "You like Chinese Food."
                              Omg, it's like they can read your mind.

                                Comment

                                • Jam930
                                  FFR Player
                                  • Apr 2004
                                  • 1069
                                  #9
                                  ...they taste good.
                                  -Jamie

                                    Comment

                                    • Unit000
                                      FFR Player
                                      • May 2004
                                      • 45
                                      #10
                                      ...retards
                                      Heavy morals seem so light but when it comes to cash I\'m gonna die all right!

                                      The United States of The Hives

                                        Comment

                                        • netty400
                                          FFR Player
                                          • Aug 2003
                                          • 496
                                          #11
                                          Nice post.

                                          Well one of mine said "You will ask that certian someone out" or somthing..

                                          But I couldn't find that certian someone =/
                                          Originally posted by zildjian133
                                          Dude where the hell did they find those balls, I swear to god I\'d buy one if I knew where and how to get one...
                                          Knuck if you buck
                                          http://www.lyricstop.com/k/knuckifyoubuck-crimemob.html

                                            Comment

                                            • Arch0wl
                                              Banned
                                              FFR Simfile Author
                                              • Dec 2002
                                              • 6344
                                              #12
                                              Originally posted by Anticrombie0909
                                              "Don't kid yourself. The people at the video store know exactly what you're renting."
                                              Holy CRAP XD

                                              Dude you should've saved it and taken a picture of it

                                                Comment

                                                • Laharl
                                                  FFR Player
                                                  • Sep 2003
                                                  • 1821
                                                  #13
                                                  Adding "in bed" to the end of fortune cookie messages unlocks their true meaning.

                                                  "Take a trip with a friend."

                                                  "You are skilled and talented."

                                                  "Your ability to love will help a child in need."

                                                  "A loved one will soon happily re-enter your life."

                                                  Those are all fortune cookie messages that I've got in my wallet. I keep them from when I go to Panda Express to get my lovely Orange Chicken. I have more if you want to hear them, too.
                                                  SIG PICTURES:

                                                  POINTLESSLY TAKING UP BANDWIDTH SINCE THE INCEPTION OF THE INTERNET

                                                    Comment

                                                    • netty400
                                                      FFR Player
                                                      • Aug 2003
                                                      • 496
                                                      #14
                                                      Originally posted by Laharl
                                                      I keep them from when I go to Panda Express to get my lovely Orange Chicken
                                                      You RULE
                                                      Originally posted by zildjian133
                                                      Dude where the hell did they find those balls, I swear to god I\'d buy one if I knew where and how to get one...
                                                      Knuck if you buck
                                                      http://www.lyricstop.com/k/knuckifyoubuck-crimemob.html

                                                        Comment

                                                        • RobbyZero
                                                          FFR Player
                                                          • Sep 2003
                                                          • 4613
                                                          #15
                                                          Originally posted by Unit000
                                                          ...retards
                                                          Stfu

                                                          Fortune cookies are teh suck at telling fortunes OBVIOUSLY. When I go to chinese bouffet I steal like 20 of them just to eat and laugh at the fortunes.

                                                            Comment

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