Timesplitters: Rewind

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  • darklordsarumon9
    FFR Veteran
    • Feb 2005
    • 1777

    #1

    Timesplitters: Rewind

    It's seems as of late most of my video game wishes have come true (Still waiting for a Golden Sun Final Mix and Kingdom Hearts 3. Sue me). A fun dungeon crawler with awesome skills? Path of Exile.
    I'd sure love another Batman game....Batman: Arkham Origins.
    Then comes word that Crytek has given the ok for all three Timesplitter games to be brought to PC, updated and improved.

    Timesplitters in a nutshell, is pretty much what it sounds like. You're Cortez, going through time doing various things such as destroying zombie samples in Russia to runnin' around gangster controlled Chicago hunting Al Capone all while trying to stop the titular TimeSplitters from using SPACE CRYSTALS to change Earth's past. Think shooter with wacky time traveling story slammed with the style of Borderlands and a little of the comedy. Then again, plots of shooters rarely matter. BUT SPACE CRYSTALS

    What drew me in as a 16 year old on Timesplitters was the various characters, weapons, scenarios and mods. Moon Base, Virus (fire tag pretty much), paintball mode as the Monkey. Wild Wild West, BagTag (hold the bag), Sticky Mines only as Robert One-oh-Seven. The amount of ways you could play the game blew my mind at the time. I believe that every character in the game could be unlocked to play as, along with some very, very weird other ones.

    By far my favorite was the assault mode. Capture point A, blow up point B and defend point C. The bots were fairly smart and would actually cut you off at choke points. Damn bots could also roll and dodge your shots (which the player character was not allowed to do)

    There were also scenarios alongside the main missions and multiplayer. Kill 18 monkeys while being swarmed with a ton of dudes. Only kill the guys. Flamethrower snowmen to death. Shoot the hats off NPCs. Then you were graded on your time taken and given a reward based on that, be it a new character, multiplayer map unlock or even game cheats.

    I never got into using it but there was also a map creation mode. I just wanted to kill shit, you understand?

    While Im on the subject a few little sidenotes. Most rediculous character? The fucking Calamari. A giant Cala-fucking-mari. My friend had the game too, so when he brought his save pack over his account was named "PigFucker" which when I was 16 was soooo funny to me.

    tl;dr Meeting adjourned.
    The remake is going to be free, so there is no reason why you shouldn't check this out when it drops sometime next year or if your interest has been peaked there is a supposed demo to come in December. It would even be worth your while to look for a copy of one of these games. I recommend Timesplitters 2, because the origional shows it's age very badly from the PS1 and :Future Perfect pulls a Diablo 3 - Yes it's got the title but not the spirit.

    Gonna be a hell of a long wait for this gamer.
    Last edited by darklordsarumon9; 04-19-2013, 06:37 PM.
    Originally posted by Choofers
    i was up aound 11 ish to my my mom textinin me over voaevover avo oover, asking if o wamt food from china so i said hai and off sent went to a p; blasnd buffet bu o wl who cares
    Originally posted by cetaka
    whats namine like in person
  • FissionMailed1
    FFR Player
    • Feb 2012
    • 1267

    #2
    Re: Timesplitters: Rewind

    Holy shit, a Timesplitters game for PC! I have a ton of play time on Timesplitters 2 and Timesplitters: Future Perfect. I really hope it can compare to the previous games. I'm pretty hype. If it is being developed by Crytek, I am skeptical at best though, unfortunately.


    YOUR THROBBING MULTIFARIOUS LUSTFUL DESIRES ARE COMPLETED N YOUR HYPER-ORANGE SELF, YOU MAKE ME LOVE AGAIN, YOU'VE CHANGED MY HEART, MY MELANCHOLIA DISAPPEARS WHEN YOU ARE INSIDE OF ME, MY HUMAN RAGE IS TEMPERED WHEN I AM INSIDE YOU, THE SECRET IS COMMUNICATION, LONGEVITY, STAMINA, REPETITION, FURY, SOULFUL KISSING, EARPLUGS. YOU FUCKING CORPORATE COCKS AND CUNTS.

    MY ANXIETY COMPLETE, MY DESIRE REPLETE, THE TASTE OF ORANGE BLOOD AND CUM AND GREENBACKS RUNNING DOWN MY FACE. THE STREETS WILL RUN ORANGE WITH YOUR MIXTURE OF CHEETOS AND HUNDRED DOLLAR BILLS REGURGITATED AND EATEN AND SHIT OUT AGAIN AND EATEN AGAIN.

    YOU ARE MY SCULPTURE, MY SCULPTRA, MY SELF-DEFINITION. MY DEFINITION OF HUMANITY, MY HARMONY. MY HEART AND MY MIND.

    YOU ARE SO ORANGE. SO CRUNCHY. SO CONSUMABLE.

    THE NEW ORANGE UNDERGROUND IS THE ORANGE UP MY ASS. AND YOUR ASS.

    I LOVE YOU CHEETOS.

    Comment

    • Untimely Friction
      D6 Challeneged
      • Aug 2012
      • 1267

      #3
      Re: Timesplitters: Rewind

      WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT...

      Future perfect was best

      Comment

      • Charu
        Snivy! Dohoho!
        FFR Simfile Author
        • Mar 2006
        • 6161

        #4
        Re: Timesplitters: Rewind

        I would generally be glad about this news, but the words Crytek make me think they're going to throw a curve ball and say "MUST HAVE LATEST HARDWARE THAT CAN RUN DX12 BLAH BLAH"

        That's the vibe I get from Crytek all the time when they do release something. They generally like to push hardware limitations rather than provide solid gameplay mechanics, heh.

        By the way, no hate for the devs, their Crysis trilogy was kind of fun, but you got to admit they do favor bypassing a new threshold in real time renderings than gameplay.


        Originally posted by JohnRedWolf87
        Charu the red-nosed Snivy
        Had a very shiny nose
        And if you ever saw it
        You could even say it glows

        All of the other Snivies
        Used to laugh and call him names
        They never let poor Charu
        Join in any Snivy games

        (Click the arrow to see the rest)


        Originally posted by Vendetta21
        All in all I would say that Charu not only won this game, his play made me reconsider how I play it.

        Comment

        • Herogashix
          D7 Dating Sim Player
          FFR Music Producer
          • Apr 2009
          • 2183

          #5
          Re: Timesplitters: Rewind

          ho
          ly
          shit.

          My body is 1 year too ready.

          Comment

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