ZOMG SANTA'S SECRET IDENTITY REVEALED!!!
Posted on: December 4, 2007, at 07:17:46am

This weekend i was at work and for one reason or another, i got to thinking about Santa Claus and the things he does and why, and that's when i realized that something was horribly wrong. I figured out Santa's secret identity!

I first thought of how santa is breaking into millions of houses all in one night, and that made me deduce that he is not in fact a caucasian, but indeed is black. My reasons for believing this are because only a black man could break into so many houses so fast.

Then i thought of how he was only breaking into said houses for the children of the household, and i realized that Santa must be a Pedophile! Why else would he go into the houses just for children?

This was all astounding enough, but then i realized something even worse. I knew who Santa really was and i wasn't liking the only plausible answer.

Santa Claus is Michael Jackson! What other black man has the funds, the pedophilic interest, could get away with it without legal repercussions, AND could be mistaken for a white man? NONE!

Therefore i ask you all to think about this.

WTF IS GOING ON???!!!

P.S. - I've gotten comments about this being offensive and rascist. Yes, I will admit that this is a bit rascist, and i am not exactly happy about it being that way. The fact of the matter is though, this random thought was posted to entertain. If you don't like it, then that's ok with me. You are welcome to your own thoughts and opinions.

1. 1: xxx...rawr.
   Posted at 2:32pm on December 6th, 2007

   LMAO! ALOT!
2. 2: ShukakuIsTanuki
   Posted at 1:16am on December 10th, 2007

   SHUKAS SCARED!!
3. 3: ShukakuIsTanuki
   Posted at 2:35pm on December 18th, 2007

   ...santa comes wen kiddys sleep, right...?
   ...zomg...they might get raped!!! O_O
4. 4: deadendroad5577
   Posted at 9:33pm on January 15th, 2008

   oh noes, everything now makes sense!!!
5. 5: princesscianni
   Posted at 12:27pm on January 22nd, 2008

   lol did u think of this yourself or read it somewhere? the black thing is a touch racist but i do get the point
6. 6: gorillakyuubi
   Posted at 1:36pm on February 8th, 2008

   it was very funny but it was racist and therfor i hate it and im black....
7. 7: Roy565
   Posted at 5:16am on July 28th, 2008

   Lmao!
   Wonderful theory.
   But like, lay off the black point.
   Kind of racist.